The Monday Listicle for this week (yes I am just getting it juuust in on time) – Here are 10 people I would have over for dinner, in no order or seating arrangement. I will not automatically add that mandatory 18% tip for this party.
No pictures, as finding, crediting, resizing is a chore. Plus explanations are more entertaining.
1. Desiderius Erasmus. I am listing him first because whenever I am asked this question at job interviews and I am allowed only one guest, I always say him. Look up his story for the full reason, but my main reason would be he stood unwavering by his personal ideals at a polarizing movement in the church and society. That sort of character is very inspiring to me in these times, and always in my personal ethics.
2. Ernest Hemingway. He would have some good stories for general conversation, or I might ask him to hunt/fish for our dinner.
3. Rick Bayless. A professional chef in Chicago who specializes in Mexican cuisine. He knows how to throw a good party and could help me cook up whatever Ernie brings back. Plus he knows his tequila, which though I hate it, can liven the place up.
4. Lloyd Kaufman. Troma films (Toxic Avenger, Class of Nuke ’em High) has a cult following of movies that are typically low-budget, bawdy comedy/horrors with endless slapstick jokes, gratuitous nudity and bad special effects that make the graphic violence even more over the top. So yes we would have to discuss the details of Zombie Bunnies: The Movie.
5. Philip K. Dick. I greatly admire his writing; his sci-fi and philosophies are not too complicated but are deeply personal. His stories/characters go along the lines of societal and culture in his day, and now, painting a vision of the future that is entirely plausible.
6. Princess Leia. Yes the character. No, the slave girl costume from Return of the Jedi is not mandatory. But I wouldn’t protest if she did. She’s not just a pretty face; the first thing we see her do in the movies is zap a stormtrooper, then stand firm against Vader without flinching (and then later mouth off to a Grand Moff). Hemingway would respect that.
7. Misty May-Treanor / Kerry Walsh Jennings. They are a team and so count as one. As the Olympic rules go (and as with Leia), the bikini is not mandatory. Wearing their 2012 gold medals IS mandatory. Again, yeah they are sexy, but their ethos of trust and teamwork, and the willingness to work as hard at keeping that as strong as their sporting achievements is admirable.
8. Abe Lincoln. I think he and Teddy Roosevelt get invites on many of these lists- I would have to give him plenty of notice. He and Erasmus could discuss that whole ‘diligence in the face of polarized politics’ idea I spoke about. Also I could get his side of the story about the vampire hunting.*
9. George Lucas. This is who everyone would guess I would invite, if I had one guest. Well ok, fine. He gets in on the original trilogy, and for Zak McKraken (an 80’s video game), and THX 1138. However, all he gets are Wookie Cookies and Blue Milk. If Ernie somehow snags a Gungan, George gets the head portion
10. Animal from the Muppets. If all else fails and dinner is a bore/bust, he can just start a food fight. I’ll try and keep him clear of the tequila.
*there is also a low budget movie about his zombie hunting past on Netflix Instant. Review of that coming soon.