Tag Archives: top 10 lists

Monday Listicles – Old Skool Supplies

The Monday Listicles for this week: Anything that has to do with school. All I can remember are pencils, books, teacher’s dirty looks. Those were the days. If schools were made to prepare us for the real world, why don’t we still use half this stuff?

10 School Supplies I Wish I Could Take to Work

Keep in mind if I forget to specify, any/all of these items would be in neon colors and/or featuring artwork of Transformers, Pac Man or New Wave/rock bands.

1. Lunchbox. I actually have several useable ones now, but what I would do for my old Pac Man or Dukes of Hazzard one. Metal, not plastic, to dissuade SOME bullies.

2. Lunch…in that box…already made for me. Sure I am self-sufficient, but Moms make it best, right? Yes that was a nod and plug to all you mom bloggers. Your efforts are appreciated, even if you did forget to cut the crusts off. Again.

3. Crayons. 24 pack would suffice, a 64 pack had the built-in sharpener.

4. Trapper Keeper. Sealed with Velcro, you know the contents are safe.

5. Jar of paste. For snackin! KIDDING! Mom snuck cookies in that lunch.

6. ‘Manual’ pencil sharpener. I liked making those little ‘roses’ from turning the pencil juuuust right. Crayons  should not be used in these.

7. Erasers. When shaped as cartoons/toys, they doubled as something to entertain while the teacher wasn’t looking.

8. Tennis/blue/pink bouncy ball. Normally used for recess, I wouldn’t mind a round of “off the wall” during lunch.

9. A joke book. Yes I had many joke books, and they made their way to my bookbag. I think I was independently studying to be a comedian. Jokes these days aren’t just plain funny, they are just sexual or meant to offend (I am not condemning that one bit, in my teenage years I ‘graduated’ to Truly Tasteless Jokes), but let’s give a nod to the ‘clean’ pun once in a while.

10. A watch calculator*. The first Smart device.

*Yes Ms. WWM, you are forever linked to these by me.

15 Comments

Filed under Life, Lists, Monday Listicles, Writing, Writing Challenges

The Sounds That Bring Fury

I entered this contest by Northwest Mommy (click box for her), which I found through Ms. Worrell. It’s all about networking. Also about new ideas!

The topic for this week is/are: The 10 sounds I cannot stand.

1. Tim McCarver / Joe Buck or Michael Kay being the announcers for baseball/football/ nascar/etc. I am always thankful when Fox isn’t showing the event. Joe Buck announces like he’s explaining to kids how the game is played.

2. The sound of construction, especially when jackhammers are present. There is always a ton of that going on around NYC, always in different phases with their associated cacophony.

3.Trucks downshifting/bus brakes squealing. Tie that in with #2 and that’s what I hear most mornings before 9am.

4. Glass breaking. What a horrible high pitched sound that is. It unnerves me- one time in particular, a glass jar smashed about a foot from me in a small room. Between the unexpected-ness of it and the sound, it gave me a supreme headache.

5. Idiotic cell phone conversations. They are always the loudest, and usually unintelligible (in English or not). There are never any conversations involving treasure chests. WHY IS THIS? There is no cell phone service in the subways (for now, and I hope never), so the best part of any ride is any that is underground.

6. Kids carrying on in restaurants. Ok, so I understand, sometimes people want to take their kids out. Sometimes they can’t find a sitter. I would be fine with it, if that family were in another restaurant on another planet. Let ‘em scream their heads off there! There might even be those parents who think the child is just expressing themselves. I have a way of expressing myself too, along with interpretative dance. Want me to perform next to you while you eat? Aw, why not? *note: babies who sit there babbling and drooling while doing those little fidgeting motions in their chair are usually cute, and are therefore acceptable.

7. Protests that consist of couplet phrases, especially “2, 4, 6, 8…”. Not too long ago, people wrote entire SONGS protesting things. They make records and everything. Yours is barely haiku length. Get a guitar and start working on it.

8. The sound of the Red Sox winning the World Series. Seeing it is just as bad. The bitter taste is pretty awful too. Actually you know what; it offends all the senses, (including ESP). Their futility was something I was hoping to hand down to my kids.

These guys led the Red Sox victory parade.

9. When the lady reading the live lottery drawing reads off numbers that aren’t on my ticket(s). That annoys the hell out of me every time, especially when I have already spent part of my expected winnings.

10. My phone ringing, while I am at work writing this post. True story. Someone must want something. WTF is that about?!

Well why should I concentrate only on the negatives? Besides the fact it is the assignment. Here are some things I enjoy hearing:

1. 80’s music. Even songs I didn’t like back then are great for me now. Even when those songs are used for commercials with butchered alternate lyrics to fit the product. Right now Liberty Mutual is using Human League’s “Human” as background music; not sure if you can claim “Just being human” in the accident report. It sure doesn’t work in court!

2. Crows cawing to each other. The more the merrier (ironically they are called murders). Yes I know, it is a horrible screeching sound. That’s the point, they are communicating some important crow-related info, not just clucking or cooing. See my other list, and really, wouldn’t you rather hear this any day than bratty kids or jackhammers?

3. “We have a winner!” in any contest, even if it’s Bingo with old people. Yes I have beaten old people…at Bingo.

4. “Not guilty, by reason of awesomeness” (Jury deliberated for like 5 minutes and that included bathroom breaks). You might be thinking, wouldn’t it be better to be found guilty of being awesome? Well, that’s just crazy talk there. And going back to #1, that claim has never worked either.

5. Cicadas rustling in the trees. Bonus when they are in several different trees and each pick up where the other left off, like it is a competition. To me, it means the dog days of summer are here, but it is usually the morning when I hear them, still not too hot. A nice start.

6. “And the Yankees have defeated the Red Sux…I mean Sox…wait, I did mean Sux.”

Gotta love traditions.

7. The Star Wars fanfare. Even with the prequels, at least the movies START awesomely.

8. “Mr. Lucas is on the phone. He wants to know what color you want your fully fuctional lightsaber to be.” (note_2: blue or green)

9. The wind blowing and rustling leaves. As with cicadas in summer, this usually means early summer or the middle of fall. A bonus when it’s nice cool weather and I can hear/see the leaves fall and skitter along the ground/concrete.

10. Absolute silence. Sometimes that is the best thing to hear.

9 Comments

Filed under Complaints, General Nerdliness, Humor, Life, Rants, Writing, Writing Challenges